GW BB Episode 1
Introductions The host and creator of Glee Wiki (some random bitch that no one knows) makes her way in front of the Glee Wiki mansion, holding a mic. "Welcome to Glee Wiki Big Brother!!"She screams as her toupee flies of her head and into the trash where it belongs. "Let's meet out first sixteen contestants!" The screen pans over to some kid w/ glasses. "Hi am Jonathan, I'm young, hung and clearly march to the sound of MY own drum so - Props to ya' mama." He starts to play Pokemon on his DS and masturbate to pictures of Andy. "I'm a big fan of Andy Jenner - She's a beautiful goddess and I need to leech off of her relevance as the resident cunty bitch if I want to stay in the GW Mansion." He scratches his arse. "My tactic is to just be nice and funny." He flashes a smile at the camera. "I'm Lisa and if you're not nice. LEAVE." It pans over to a clip of Lisa working at her job in K-Mart (That's Kalison-Mart. She works for AMBROSIA after their elusive battle.) "I hate my job and the fact that I work for someone who called me a Clitoris and was banned by the Wikia Staff yet she STILL gets to compete is enraging. My tactic is to murder AMBROSIA." "I'm Luke, I'm a GW ex-pat and an iconic slut for being everyone's G.B.F while also being no-one's G.B.F" The camera zooms into his large collection of dragon dildos. "I'm an iconic bitch because --" He is suddenly interrupted by LVCh0rd, who just covers his mouth and walks off. "My tactic is to become Admin and basically win lol" "I'm Timothy Krabapple and you're a cunt. I like Dianna Agron's big fat poussey and insulting Joeuuwu on twattor." Tim sips on his tequila. "If I win, I will buy a big plot of land and ship everyone dont like off to it, build them a nice home, give them plenty of money, then blow it up. That's also my tactic." "My name is Cass, I'm known for being Glee Wiki's coolest lesbian." She sits on her throne, picking her nails and throwing money at the needy (RISEAGAINST). "If I win, I will buy a big flower patch and spread niceness all across the world!" Everyone rolls their eyes at how nice she is but they all love her and god knows her and jade are the best admins anyway. "My tactic is to seduce everyone with my lesbionic manners and then kick their asses out." "I'm Sky and I'm a crack whore." The camera fades out into a montage of her snorting cocaine and stuffing weed in her anus. "I can't wait to get in the big brother house and get #TURNTUP" Everyone just looks confused and doesn't know if she's high or not. "My tactic to win is to sell drugs and make lots of money that way then I wont need to win!" She pulls a joint out of her vagina and smokes it. "Hello I'm Tomas a.k.a The Elusive Chanteuse and I'm better than you." Tomas sits in a room surrounded by Mariah Carey posters, statuettes, CDs and other Mariah Carey paraphernalia. "I'm a fan of Mariah Carey." Everyone sits in silence as Tomas lip synchs to her greatest hits (All I want For Christmas) before he is sedated. "My tactic to win is to wait for Sis to join so I can ride on her relevance. "I'm Sasha and I joined the house when I was eleven but they were all too stupid to notice so I wasnt banned lol" They sit in silence for the next five minutes. "My tactic is to win." "WAHOO TIME TO ADD A NEW CHAPTER TO THE #LIFEOFVIK BABY" He starts to twerk as Sydney watches eagerly in the distance. "IM VIKTOR AND IM A COOL MOFO AND THE LIFE OF VIK NEEDS A MAJOR UPDATE SO HERE I AM!" Everyone just looks confused. "IF ZAC EFRON DOESNT MAKE A GUEST APPEARANCE SO I CAN SUCK HIM I WILL CRY. MY TACTIC TO WIN IS TO BE BETTER THAN YOU." "hrey am joey aka the elusve chantse and im the origenal troll" everyone runs in fear, terrified of whats of to come. "I hev my own fashen line. the andy jennor foundashun. we sell denim shorts, ugly sneakers and white socks only." Andy rolls his eyes. "my tactic to win is to be so iconic they simply cant let me leave." "I'm Angelika and I hate Sharon Osbourne. That fat wh0re. She attacked me on Club Penguin Wiki like wtf" Angelika starts to throw darts at printed images of CPPerapin and Sharon osbourne. "My tactic to win is to be a shade the f*ck out of everyone the minute i enter the house." "I'm Hunter........ and I literally have no idea why I'm here no one even knows who i am tbh" No one cares enough to continue his interview and I genuinely have no idea who he is so I can't write sh*t about him lol x "Hrey am Joseph Uwu and I keep it real, hennies x" Joe cries and gets an emotional storyline almost straight away. "WHEN I WAS SIX MY MAMA TOLD ME: LITTLE BOY, YOU SMELL LIKE A COCK AND I SAID MAMA NO I DONT MAMA YOU JUST DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME WHY AM I SO MISUNDERSTOOD, THEN SHE SAID TO ME SIT YOU ASS DOWN AND SHUT THE HELL UP BITCH AND I CRIED." The whole camera crew begin to cry and wave their handkerchiefs. "My tactic to win is to kill the admins in their sleep." "I'm Hayley and I'm australian." Hayley begins to skip about with the wallabys, koalas, kiwis, dingos and the kangeroos. "I play the didgeridoo and eat vegemite all day." She spends the whole day being a stereotypical Australian. "My tactic to win is to.... I have no idea." "I'm Rea and I want to know what are the symptoms of being Realicious?!??!?!" She blows a kiss to the camera. "I'm just gonna go in there and be myself and win and everyone will bow down to me and the Brittany Wiki will prevail. The end." "I'm Daniel and fuck Beyonce Knowles. WHY DID SHE WANT ME TO COME TO CHAT. WAS IT REALLY THAT IMPORTANT?!" Joe begins to sweat and look suspicious. "If I want to win I'm going to go to chat and really see what Beyonce wanted." Episode The day begins with them all waking up to Tomas squawking out another Mariah Carey #1 "hit". They all get enraged at him and they're fuming, tamping, raging ect. They all spread out, some going to check out the kitchen, some going to have anal sex in the bathroom (TIM AND JOE). Tomas takes Sky to the side and they make a pact to nom Sasha Belle if one of them become the HoH. They all sit and piss about for an hour basically until Big Ruba makes her announcement. "make your way to the garden thank you" they all look confused as they walk out and see a huge obstacle course. A tape of Tim in the diary room pops up. HoH "Unless Dianna Agron is at the end of this course, I ain't doing shit. I'm over it." It goes back to the garden where everyone is wearing sumo suits and whoever finished the course first wins HoH. Sky gets ready by snorting a whole bag of cocaine and Tomerier falls asleep. Joey wears his v fashenable clotheing line over the top of his sumo suit. Angelika is READY and Tim falls asleep. -Joe in the diary room- "Tim just fell asleep. What a dumb mexican wh0re." Tim has sweet dreams about Dianna Agron and Joe as the race begins, the gunshot waking Tim up and he literally shits himself. They all start to run in their sumo suits, Sky in last place just behind Sasha because she rugby tackled her, Angelika, Luke and Cass in the lead. Angelika looks a bit pissed off tbh and tries to rugby tackle Cass to get in the lead, but instead she just falls off the course and breaks her neck and has to go to hospital. Luke starts to run like a boss ass bitch and beats the sh*t out of everyone, declaring him the winner. Luke jumps up and down in excitement. Joey is a bit pissed off because he's never looked so good in his clotheing but it was wasted because he didn't get the sexy winners pan-in shot. They all ruturn to the GW Mansion and everyone is scared because Luke doesnt really know anyone here so god knows who he'll vote. Everyone starts to suck up to him like a little cow. Sky offers him drugs and Tim offers him his body but Luke has HAD IT. "Listen here i've had enough of this shit I don't want to be here anymore i'm fucking LEAVING" Luke gets up and leaves and is 87th place overall RIP. Cass is the new HoH for coming in second and already knows who she's going to nominate. "IT'S TIME TO START THE NOMINATIONS CEREMONY. GET FUCKING THROUGH HERE." Nominations "Okay hennies, I'll be nominating Hayley, She literally hasn't done anything since she entered the house and I'm bored. I'll also be nominated Hunter and Rea for the same reasons and Joey because he's a twat and I HATE trolls and his clothing line is UGLY." Joey cries and runs off to hatch a plan so he can murder the competitors when alison jean arrives. Rea is a bit pissed off tbh and her and Tim outcast Cass and become allies to take her ass down. Hayley doesn't understand whats going and just sits there and Hunter blames everyone for bullying. Then - Hunter starts his sh*t he gets up and starts to scream at Cass. "IT'S YOU AND THE SAVAGES YOU ARE ALL GLEE WIKI BULLIES WHY ARE YOU SO RUDE TO EVERYONE LIKE ALYSSA AND THE ADMINS AND YOU'RE JUST A LESBIAN JUST STOP WHY WOULD YOU NOM ME YOU BULLY RT" Cass just rolls her eyes and walks off.